Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in labellavita85's LiveJournal:

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Friday, April 7th, 2006
5:17 pm	Shallow Judgements In todays world, we tend to not see past the outside. Thanks to magazines,and tv shows, like "What Not To Wear," and Hollywoods Best Dressed List" it makes being a normal human being more difficult than it needs to be. Just like in High School if you didn't shop at Aeropastle and Wet Seal, you weren't worth talking to. What happened to outcasts? Well they usually grow up doing something more interesting with their lives instead of fitting the norm like everyone else. Individuality is a dying breed, and that is truly sad. I've been dinking around on this dating site to see what my peers are actually looking for and most of them believe it or not, are looking for Paris Hilton. I honestly saw one persons ad that stated "i will not accept fat ankles." I was seriously shocked that our society is getting to the point where a persons ankles are taken into context of character. Myspace for example, people have those little surveys on what kind of person they are looking for. "No fat chicks", "I prefer blondes" , "Should be 5'5" and etc. Are these really the aspects we should be using to find friends and possible partners? "oh yea and a good personality" is usually the last thing they list. But is personality really one of their priorities? Also a persons sexuality is taken into context as well. Example: "Must know what they are doing in bed, i've trained too many people." It's like applying for a job and having to pass all the job requirements and live up to someones impractical idea of what a person should be. Maybe we should list the realistic point of view of ourselves. "Hi, I'm Carrie. I'm not 5'5 with blonde hair and a airbrushed tan. I'm pale and overweight and have tattoos. I don't shop at American Eagle and spending over $25 on a pair of jeans makes me nervous. I am currently unemployed and live at home with my parents. I don't own a BMW or diamonds. I don't hang out in trendy clubs or drink trendy drinks. I like cheap Smirnoff and the occassional Malibu. I enjoy fast food and refuse to be on the South Beach Diet. I do not wear designer shoes or high heels. I like my Adidas shell-toes and my Converse Chuck Taylors. I do not own a Dooney and Burke bag. Von Dutch is ok with me. I listen to P!nk and Aerosmith avidly. I am a real person and yes I burp and go to the bathroom. My boobs are real. I was never a waitress in a bar and Hooters or Subis won't have me. I like comedies and the Mafia. I enjoy who I am and you wont catch me in a tanning salon or a fancy stylists. I don't live in a big house in the Hills. I was born in Detroit, concieved in a trailer park, and raised in Taylor Michigan by parents who didn't go to college or win the lottery. I love my friends for who they are and not what they look like or where they shop,or their status in life. I love my parents and family. I don't smoke weed or sniff coke. I am a songwriter with an original twist and my songs dont include the any of the following..."22's, Cristol, Pimpin, Hoes, I am perfect, everyone wants to be me, and follow in my footsteps, Buy my album and my clothing line to be cool," etc. I can be stubborn and sometimes selfish. I don't like clingy people and I don't need your money to make me happy. You don't need to tell me how much money you make or what your parents do for a living. You don't have to wear Sean Jean. I PREFER ORIGINALITY. thank you for your time. Current Mood: determined (Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 5th, 2006
2:08 am	Can't Sleep I've been dreadfully sick the past few days. It makes it so hard to go to sleep at night when I can't breathe. I feel like my chest is caving in. Today was better but the breathing is still difficult. My mom was afraid that I have pnemonia, I doubt thats what it is though. Perhaps if the chest pain,trouble breathing,and bad cough doesnt stop in the next couple days I'll go to the doctor. Anyway, bought P!nks new cd today and love it. I've been listening to it all day haha. I love her songwriting, and soulful voice. Its a breath of fresh air amongst all of these no talent having plastic surgery enhanced hefords!!!!! haha. I noticed I've been venting on a lot of people lately. As if every wrong they've ever done to me is being apprehended and I just explode. Makes me feel accomplished. Still no luck finding a job and it feels no one could care less. I'm starting to lose faith (wait a minute, what faith?) What the fuck am I going to do when my fucking bills are due? Why must I continue to make bad choices???? Current Mood: sick (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 30th, 2006
11:55 am	So Far.... I've been working on yet another emotional song. Its a work in progress and a waste of trees since I've been drafting so much. Maybe I should just start typing my drafts instead of filling many many notebooks. Tis a beautiful day outside and I have nothing to do, no where to go. I'm starting to worry that I won't be able to pay my phone bill this month. I'm selling a vintage Alligator skin bag on ebay for $100. Hopefully someone will think its amazing and want it more than anything. I've been thinking a lot about my unhappiness with myself and how I longed for someone to care. Now I realize if I'm so unhappy, I can't let anyone care. I can't have a relationship with someone and expect them to fix all my problems. So far from my experience they only make it worse. I have to fix myself somewhat first. The only thing is, I don't really know how. Again, I feel trapped and stuck with no place to run. I need to stop being so afraid and chasing people away. I've had many advancements from people wanting to hang out, go to the movies, actual dates to actual places, not shitty motels. But to me, I find something wrong with them. I think they have hidden agendas. I'm also embarassed to tell people "hey i have no job or no money!" Then I look like a loser looking for someone to pay my way. I don't want that. I want my independence. I hate feeling like I have to rely on someone else. So I push everyone away. Ignore their calls. So now I look like a real bitch. But its my defense mechinism and my need to protect others from me. I'm just a ball of issues. "Back To Being Me" Somehow I thought I knew What I was getting myself into At first I thought I felt something for you But the feeling only lasts a mere moment You remind me, we're here for fun, no commitment You won't give your heart or any compassion You think I don't know better, I'm just too young What I thought was love in this shitty motel Was just a void being filled, and a story to tell But when I leave I'm back to being me The me you don't want to know The me I won't be able to show The me you don't want in your life The me thats too young to see your lies I'm back to being just the 20 year old me What I thought was a feeling for another human being Was just a moment with no meaning We have nothing in common and nothing to say But you give me the attention I so desperately crave I'll pretend I'm someone else, and put on my happy face Whenever I meet you here at this place Thats all it is, and all it'll ever be Deep down I know that isn't the real me But when I leave I'm back to being me The me you don't want to know The me I won't be able to show The me you don't want in your life The me thats too young to see your lies I'm back to being just the 20 year old me Don't say I'm too young to know what would make me happy Don't pretend to care and think you know whats best for me You only call when you want something from me Thats ok, you don't have to like me, that I can see I don't want your thoughts or guidence So just keep your two cents When I leave this place I just want to forget And go home and wake up to my innosence I wasn't really there for a good time I wasn't with that 30 year old last night That wasn't really me! But when I leave I'm back to being me The me you don't want to know The me I won't be able to show The me you don't want in your life The me thats too young to see your lies I'm back to being just the 20 year old me Current Mood: accomplished (Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 29th, 2006
2:14 pm	A Simple Excitement Thanks to MTV.coms the Leak I get to hear P!nk's new CD before it comes out on Tuesday. Of course it is what I totally expected from P!nk. Pure brilliance and heartfelt. It's amazing how I can relate to just about everything she sings. I think my favorite on the album is "A Long Way To Happy" It describes my feelings right now exactly. Her albums always inspire me to write more of my own songs. Which I love. I can't wait to buy it on Tuesday. I'm excited! So far no luck in the job search and I'm completly miserable about it. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, "maybe I should've stayed..." Then I think about it some more and I remember why I left to begin with. I just wish it didn't have to be so hard to find something that fits me. Maybe nothing does and I'm doomed to stay 20 years old forever. Not thrilled. Help? Realized Adams intentions and you know what? I'm ok with it...did I just say that? He's ok to have fun with and I didn't really have feelings for him. I was just so lonely and thought that I had developed a feeling for another human being. In all reality, that isn't the case. You can't develop feelings for someone who has no heart. (inspiration for a song?) But for that mere moment in that shitty motel, some sort of void is being filled and then its over and its back to being me again. The me he doesn't want to know, or have in his life. Current Mood: excited (Comment on this)
Saturday, March 25th, 2006
7:57 pm	Lonely On A Saturday Night Here it is a cold rainy Saturday night. Dad and I are here by ourselves bored. Moms babysitting till whenever my cousin decides to come home. KC is at his boyfriends. I guess its ok to have nothing to do. Its cold and icky outside anyway. I could put my jammies on and flip channels till my eyeballs ache then pass out. Not very eventful. Maybe I'll make some tea and listen to the Norah Jones CD my dads friend made for me. What a nice old guy. haha Its nice to know that some people out there are still thoughtful. It was really heartwarming. Simple things like that mean a lot to me. I miss working believe it or not. I miss seeing Sasha everyday and talking about the off the wall stuff we would talk about. I miss the people. Hell, I even miss Brian sometimes. When he wasn't being a first class asshole he was actually a very insightful guy. He would talk to me about mistakes he'd made in his life. How he understands why his kids will never truly forgive him. I'm glad he's doing better now. I hope they miss me around there as well. I hope I can find a new job soon, and meet as many wonderful and different people like I met there. I still have so much growing up to do. I've been noticing that a lot lately. I thought I had it all figured out but things change so much. I'm hoping that with time I will grow into a stronger more secure person. I think a lot of my depression has a lot to do with my cycle. I don't start getting really down and crazy till about a week or so before I start my period. Like my moods and emotions are just out of my control and makes me lash out on people whether they deserve it or not. That is something I really need to grab a hold of. I can't keep being this way.Its sad that during that time, the only time I feel sane is at night after taking a muscle relaxer. Now since I found out I can stay on my moms insurance till I'm 25 whether I'm in school or not, I'm more optimistic about going to the doctor. I'm glad I don't have to worry about insurance for a while. I helped my mom clean the house today. I always feel better in a clean house. Went to the laundramat and washed my blankets. Love the smell of clean blanekts.. :) Current Mood: content (Comment on this)
Friday, March 24th, 2006
12:21 am	Bitter Sweet.... Since finding people on myspace that I went to high school with, I've started noticing how far behind I really am. The majority of my old friends and class mates have moved forward with thier lives...gotten married, some to their high school sweethearts,had babies and started real lives. Here I am stuck lonely and unemployed with nothing. Its sad when they message me "whats new? how you been? hows life treatin ya?" Only because I have nothing to say. I'm pretty much in the same place I was back then, only a little older. That scares me. Current Mood: pessimistic (Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 22nd, 2006
7:28 pm	Are They All The Same? It seems to me that all guys, or atleast the ones I've met, are all on the same level of thinking. Almost as if a girls feelings shouldn't matter. You start out in a "friends with benefits" situation. You're ok with it at first because you feel you have to be. Then you develop what warm-blooded humans call "feelings" now you're being "clingy" Where is the logic in this? Current Mood: moody (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 21st, 2006
10:59 pm	feeling low again... "Falling" I feel so lost inside myself My hearts been placed back on the shelf I keep screaming out for help But everyone just walks on They all think I'm so strong But I've been falling all along I'm falling apart and I dont know why Lost all sense of place and time And I can't help but only cry Keep my feet planted on the ground As my world spins round and round Right out of control Someone please give me a hand to hold I wonder what its like to fly free Sometimes I feel like I can't breathe So here I am as it all falls down I try to scream but theres no sound The cliff is so steep, and the fall is so deep I'm starting to lose all my hope So before I fall further, please throw me a rope I'm falling apart and I dont know why Lost all sense of place and time And I can't help but only cry Keep my feet planted on the ground As my world spins round and round Right out of control Someone please give me a hand to hold I can't hold on anymore My whole body is sore Maybe I should just let go Theres nothing left for me to hold I'm falling apart, and I'm falling fast How much longer will it last? I'm falling apart and I dont know why Lost all sense of place and time And I can't help but only cry Keep my feet planted on the ground As my world spins round and round Right out of control Someone please give me a hand to hold Current Mood: lonely (Comment on this)
Monday, March 20th, 2006
10:04 pm	Time Is Going By So Fast Lately I've noticed how fast time seems to be moving. Thanks to Myspace, I've found all my old friends from high school. It seems like only yesterday we were standing in the hall outside mr. jesues science class waiting for the bell to ring. now we're all grown up. josh and autumn are still together and have a baby. its a beautiful thing. which also makes me think of how my life really hasnt changed much. i've had nothing drastic or exciting happen to me. i still feel stuck in a rutt that i cant escape. i feel like i cant breathe. i cant help but ask, is this it? went job hunting today, guess what? no luck! maybe i shouldve stayed with the sal-army and get anally raped everyday for peanuts.....not!!! Current Mood: bored (Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 15th, 2006
12:21 am	Sleepytime My night is drawing to a close. I had somewhat of an eventful day. Dropped my car off at the electric place, had lunch with mom, did some shopping,picked my car up, dinner at Applebees, went to see Final Destination 3. What an intense movie that was! Made me feel rather sick to my stomach in some scenes though. I'm starting to feel tired and ready to relax. I think bed time is my favorite time of day. Its seems like everything you did in that day can simply melt away. You take off your clothes, slip into some jammies and fall into bed. Its almost serene like for that moment you are in your own world. Well thats how I feel anyway. Dark, alone, and quiet in my own comfy space trying to find the most comfortable position to fall asleep. Then I lay there for a while and think about things...real or fantasy. I think about what is and what could be. Then I slowly drift off to sleep and every problem I was thinking of melts away. How nice it would be if life were really that easy. Current Mood: relaxed (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 14th, 2006
1:30 pm	Another Song....Damn Do I Get Bored A Lot "You Make Me High,You Bring Me Down" I just finished off this fifth Thinking about all the things I missed I know you'll never change your mind I know you'll never be completly mine Why am I being so naive? I'm just to blind to see What deep down I know will never be Everytime I watch you leave, I reach for that bottle of Jim Beam But I beam whenever you reach out for me Baby, you make me high With the way you make me sigh Baby, you bring me down So down, that in tears and alcohol I'll drown Baby, you make me high When you whisper your sweet lies Baby, you bring me down When you leave without a sound How can someone who makes me so high, Bring me so damn down? I like the way you feel But I hate the way you make me feel Like for a second we had something real But my heart is just an object you steal You're my bad day in the making You're my heart worth breaking I hate you, I love you I wish I could walk away from you Still, no one else gets me the way you do Baby, you make me high With the way you make me sigh Baby, you bring me down So down, that in tears and alcohol I'll drown Baby, you make me high When you whisper your sweet lies Baby, you bring me down When you leave without a sound How can someone who makes me so high, Bring me so damn down? I'm coming down from this high Now that you're saying good-bye Oh how I wish you would care But when I look into your eyes theres nothing there You make me laugh You make me cry You make me crash You make me high Baby, you make me high With the way you make me sigh Baby, you bring me down So down, that in tears and alcohol I'll drown Baby, you make me high When you whisper your sweet lies Baby, you bring me down When you leave without a sound How can someone who makes me so high, Bring me so damn down? Current Mood: artistic (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, March 12th, 2006
10:42 pm	Sopranos Well today was a decent day believe it or not. Slept in, cleaned the house, went to get my nails done, fucked up the polish on one of the nails, had dinner with family,took mandy to work,drank half a fifth of Malibu Rum to myself, and actually had a decent evening with Adam aka "Asshole" Maybe I was just too buzzed and thats why it seemed he was being decent. haha. Actually tonight we watched the first episode of Sopranos and had some laughs. We joked a little and talked as if maybe there was something between us. I know I'm probably just being naive though. Silly me. I got to thinking about what I was talking about with Mandy and Sasha at the mall. He doesn't want to claim me as his girlfriend, but whats up with the, what James called "Bottom Feeder" mark on my poor little neck? Haha. I realized later that Sasha always told me about how much James loved fish and thats where the whole "bottom feeder" joke came from. So now instead of calling Adam "Asshole" today, I called him "bottom feeder" haha. What great people Sasha and James are. Well I'm off to remove my make-up, put my jammies on, open my window slightly and crawl into my comfy bed. Tomorrow I will be putting in applications EVERYWHERE!! So I'll be needing my sleep so I can get up early and get a good start. Hopefully I can find something worth-while and will work with me when school starts. I know Adam is a total bottom-feeder asshole....by why does he have to be so damn cute?!?!?! I hate the fact that I'm being naive. But I watched "The Queens Of Comedy" last night on BET, naturally they bleeped out all the cuss words but, Samore, the one comedian made a joke that was so true. I dont even remember how it went, but I heard it and said, "yea thats about right". It was something like, you know you're getting it good when no matter how much of an asshole the guy is you just ignore it and say "he might change!!" and thats where I'm at. As pathetic and slut-baggish it sounds but I've never had "relations" to this extent. Hes like crack, I just keep going back for more no matter how bad it is for me. I guess thats really the only way I can explain it. Hey, he could change, right?? HAHA Now thats the Malibu talking. Current Mood: calm (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, March 11th, 2006
5:56 pm	What To Do Today I took some advantage of the decently nice weather,w ent out and did some uneccessary shopping, and now I'm sitting at home trying to get the motivation to do that pile of laundry on top of the dryer. Nobodies home besides me and the dogs and it seems so quiet. Its making me somewhat sleepy actually. There is a glimmer of sunshine outside with a hint of rain. I'd like to be out there right now actually, if only I had something to do and somewhere to go. I'm so bored of driving aimlessly, looking at the same places and things. How I long for something new and exciting. How I wish I could get out from this rutt I've been in. Maybe even find some happiness? Well I won't push my luck. I'm hoping the weather stays nice but this is Michigan. So who knows what next week will bring. haha I bought the cutest Von Dutch bag today. Big enough for all my junk yet still comfy. hmm starting to get hungry again.... Current Mood: hungry (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 9th, 2006
7:19 pm	Why Are People So Difficult?? I never knew that someone could make doing them a favor so difficult. I've been doing a lot of contemplating about the way people think. Do they really believe the shit they say? Does being an asshole really give people their jollies? People are just incredible sometimes. It's absolutely mind-boggling why people do the things they do, and why they think the way they do. I don't even want to re-play the situation that made me start doing all of this thinking, but all I know is, I can only be pushed so far. Well, my beloved car is back in the shop again. Now its the headlight switch and the wiperblade switch that all got fucked up at the same time as the ignition switch. So just like with people, if it isn't one thing its another. Thats what drives me crazy. I was supposed to have plans with "Asshole" this evening, but I'm getting to the point where I don't even want to be bothered. I mean if he never called me again, I would be more than okay with that. In the brilliant words of Sheryl Crow, whom is one of my favorite songwriters, "You bring me nothing but down" and thats really how I feel about this guy. And I don't know why I've put up with this "situation" for so long. For being 30, he sure does play a lot of mind games and I think he does it as a pastime. Like fucking with peoples minds is a fun thing to do. Again, why do people function the way they do? I get to hang out with Sasha tomorrow. That'll be nice. I miss working with her and it will be nice to catch up. Current Mood: drained (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 8th, 2006
6:42 pm	"Ambition" a CarrieMart original "Ambition" I've felt trapped my whole life Looking for a way to make everything right Always wished for a way to free my mind Working dead end jobs here and there But I could never find the heart to really care So I'm packing up and moving on Because I've found my ambition A wave of clarity has washed over me I can finally see all the things I want to be I can finally find all the places I want to go No more heartache, no more going with the flow Don't try to tell me it can't be done Because I've found my ambition Hello, state line Good-bye, old life I'm going to take the risk and roll the dice I've waited too long for my ship to come in This is no way for me to be livin I've got my mind set on brighter skies I've got bigger plans for my life So hello freeway, I'm ready to run I've found my ambition A wave of clarity has washed over me I can finally see all the things I want to be I can finally find all the places I want to go No more heartache, no more going with the flow Don't try to tell me it can't be done Because I've found my ambition No more being treated like shit Man, hes going to be so easy to forget The closer I get, the more the heat rises The closer I get, the further his disguises He never could be serious All he thought about was fucking me So fuck you too, I'm headed to Vegas, baby Hope you'll miss me when I'm gone Because I've found my ambition A wave of clarity has washed over me I can finally see all the things I want to be I can finally find all the places I want to go No more heartache, no more going with the flow Don't try to tell me it can't be done Because I've found my ambition Current Mood: creative (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 7th, 2006
10:39 am	So Little Time In A Day For Everything..... It seems odd that there are 24hrs in a day but it still feels like theres not enough time to do anything. Today will be one of those days. Mandys father passed away on Saturday, and tomorrow is the funeral. However, she wants me to go to the viewing today, so her sister volunteered me to drive her there. But, my mother is having eye surgery right now and I'm supposed to be in the shower and heading back up there to check on her. Then to top that off, I am playing business person again and have buyers for my friend Jeremys old car, so I dont know if they are coming to get it today or what so I have to wait for that before I can go to the viewing, then Mandy is staying here tonight so we can get up early for the funeral tomorrow, so that means I'll either have to stay at the viewing till 9pm or drive back to Lincoln Park.... have you noticed the skyrocketing gas prices?? Must not forget flowers for funeral!! (mind post-it) I'm sounding very insensitive right now. I feel so bad for Mandy. Shes doing well because I think she knows now her dad isn't suffering anymore. I thnk tomorrow will be hard on her and her family. Especially her mom. Well better be off to the shower it seems I have quite the day in front of me, thank goodness its a beautiful sunny day. I love sunny days. Current Mood: busy (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 1st, 2006
11:17 pm	I'm A Lonely Girl....I'll Tell A Tale For You...... Here I am sitting in front of the computer yet again. I can feel my little eyeballs straining and pain in my wrists and shoulders from this stupid keyboard. I've been feeling so lonely and unwanted lately. My family life isn't as good as it once was and sometimes I feel that if my dad could leave us, he would. It seems my mom, my brother, and myself, ruined his life and kept him from living the life he really wanted to live. Yes, my father loves us kids, and he sure does "appriciate" my mom, but I don't think he truly loves her. In fact, he can't stand her. My brother and I didn't ask to be here, and my mom wanted us, but at first my dad was hesitant. As horrible as it sounds, and I hate myself for thinking it, but sometimes I wish they wouldn't have had me. I wish my dad would've stayed with his first wife, since she was the one he really loved. I wish my mom could've found someone who truly loves her. I hate knowing that my mother is so in love with someone she's known her whole life and that deep down she knows she was picked out of convinience. I'm starting to think that maybe thats why I'm so afraid of relationships. I long so much to find someone who truly loves me, but in my heart I feel that kind of love doesn't exsist. Take a look at the relationships I've had. And now, guys only want me out of convinience, not for love, but just for a good time. Then he has the nerve to say, "You're only 20 yrs old, you shouldn't be looking to settle down." Don't tell me how I should feel or what I should be looking for. I'm not looking to settle down right now, but I'd like to find someone who cares for me and that I could maybe settle down with someday. I guess thats not a way for a 20 year old to think. I don't want to be wild and party and blah blah like he thinks I should be doing. I can have fun and still be loved by one person. As for my plans for moving to Vegas, he said I don't want to go for the same reasons he wanted to go. I just wanted to party and get tattoos and all that. And "thats good, you're 20 thats what you should do" I'm really starting to get pissed off how someone can base someones lifestyle on their age. It isn't fair, and he doesn't know me or how I feel. I don't think he really cares either. But I know what I want for my age and I don't need his opinion just because he's older than me. And why am I getting so upset over it? Why do I let these people get to me? I've been contiplating what I should do with my life, and staying here with all these demons around me isn't what I want. Not calling the people in my life "demons" or anything, but more like personal demons that I need to escape from. I keep feeling that theres a small fire inside me thats telling me that staying here and going to college, doing that typical "20 year old" shit isnt for me. I need to escape and find myself and what I want. Working at Wal-Mart or the fucking Salvation Army and living that mediocre lifestyle scares me. I don't want that, and I feel that somehow I'm destined for something better. Maybe it's just wishful thinking and I'm just filling myself with false hopes to camoflauge the real truth of my "Taylor-Tucky, Would you like fries with that?" future. Current Mood: lonely (1 Comment |Comment on this)
4:06 pm	Poop On PayPal!!! PayPal is being a pain in the ass and messed up my transaction, so now I can't take much needed money out of the bank!!! Its there but I cant touch it because PayPal is trasnferring it back into my PayPal account! Stupid bastards!!!! I need that money for Canada and the tattoo expo! I'm pretty pissed about this situation Current Mood: angry (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 28th, 2006
9:51 pm	Wow, This Tattoo Reallllly Itches!!!! I keep having to rub A&D ointment on this tattoo because of the massive itching. I feel like a crackhead because whenever one tattoo starts to itch, all the other ones do too! Isn't that weird?? Me and my mom just got done watching "Inked" naturally my dad didn't want to watch it since tattoos,people with tattoos,and tattoo artists are trashy. I'm glad my mom is so accepting and knows that tattoos mean something to the people that get them, and she sees the art. It's weird how I can get along with my mom with some things, but other times I can't stand her. Same thing with my dad, I can connect and talk to my dad about things I can't talk about with anyone else, but other things it's like we're completly different and don't see eye to eye. I guess its like that with everyone. I'm getting really sick and tired of people telling me what I should do with my life and who I should be with, and where I should meet people. I'm tired of former guys who wanted to be with me confiding in me about their current relationships...heres a thought I DON'T CARE!!!!!! Current Mood: cynical (Comment on this)
Monday, February 27th, 2006
12:59 pm	Judgement I'm getting really tired of my fathers judgements towards my tattoos. Saying they're trashy and blames the people I hang around with for my getting them. I think he's being ignorant on the subject and not realizing that it's my body and my choice. He believes I should respect him by not getting them. But why should I live my life to please others? I've been doing that for a long time and now I want to live it my way and not have to feel judged by my choices. It's ok for my brother to be gay as his lifestyle choice and its not ok for me to do what I like because my dad doesnt like it. Where is the fairness? Why can't he respect me for my choices regardless if its something he believes in or not. My tattoos all have meaning to me, they're not just random things like hey that looks cool. They mean something to me and I like them. I'm really getting tired of peoples negative and judgemental comments!!!! grr!!! Current Mood: annoyed (1 Comment |Comment on this)